Interview – The Immigrants

(Originally published in Inform Magazine, November 2003)

Tell your racist Grandma to calm down, for the name of this month’s band is The Immigrants, who actually hail from round these parts but probably can’t wait to get away. Sean, Bill, Ben and, er Law-raaa from the band are the subject of Mike Flange’s attempt to bring local bands to the masses this month. Remember, he does this because he gets paid to.

Hello The Immigrants. Now I understand you’re a really small band who play really small gigs in Liverpool. Presumably this is why I’ve never heard of you?
Sean (Vox/Gtr): Probably.
Bill (Gtr): We attained the dizzying heights of support band on Inner City Sumo though, fuck knows how that flew over your ignorant little head. We’ll play Wembley in a year or so. Shame we’ll only be playing to powertools and JCBs innit?

What’s that name all about then? Are you trying to encourage blue-rinsed old people to call for your deportation?
Bill: It’s a statement, man.
Sean: The name has no meaning whatsoever really; the fact that it was chosen around the same time a spree of ‘We Are All Immigrants’ posters were littered about Liverpool was just a good coincidence.

Now I understand you play this ‘indie’ music. Why do you do that then?
Ben (Drms): I always thought that indie meant independent, and that’s pretty much what we are. We pester people for gigs ourselves. we alienate crowds by ourselves, and we rip peoples’ eardrums out by ourselves. Independent? Fuck yes. But we don’t make ‘indie’ music.  Christ no.

Do people actually like you?
Sean: Some people do, some people really don’t – it’s not often we don’t get an extreme reaction, whether it’s positive  or negative. We’re quite happy with either.

Which other band would you all rather be in? If you had the ability?
Sean: The Immigrants, but with more ability.

I presume you like music. What other music do you like? Please make sure I’ve heard of it.
Bill: Aphex Twin, Daisy Chainsaw, Radioheads, Manics, Dead Kennedys, Butthole Surfers, Stig, At The Drive-In. We want  the rest crucified, give or take ten bands or so.
We hope to stage a reconstruction of the battle of Waterloo with the four of us, an army of Viking commando Glaswegian warriors vs Stereophonics.

Who would you like to ‘imitate’ on Stars In Their Eyes?
Sean: Aphex Twin.
Law-Raaa (Bss): Wings.

Why aren’t you on Pop Idol or Fame Academy?
Ben: Because we don’t need to go on TV to prove we’re amazing. Obviously I’m fucking joking. It’s that restraining order Simon Cowell got against me that fucked my chances up there.

Have you ever thought of going somewhere else? Touring I mean.
Bill: Bangkok, Beijing, Thailand, Cambodia, Swaziland, Iraq. Immigrants rock the Balkans tour would be good. For  the kids of course. The Balkan kids. And those poor starving Glaswegian children.
Sean: Glaswegian?
Bill: A lot of them are born into boxes with only fag ends for teddybears. Poor sods.

Which member of the band would you like to get rid of, ’cos they’re holding you back?
Sean: Me, I’m fucking useless. Couldn’t replace me though.
Ben: I’d kick Bill out, at least ’til he got that hair cut.  Fucking hippy.

Remember when music used to be good. Whatever happened to those days?
Bill: Erm, not really.

Are you going to miss the Picket?
Law-Raaa: As much as I’ll miss Quiggins.

Have you got any thing you’d like to plug?
Sean: Gigs, 14th November at The Slaughter House, 20th November at The Zanzibar, 21st November at Bar Zero and the website http://www.theimmigrants.co.uk

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About klausjoynson
I'm a writer, editor, musician, DJ and cartoonist. Contact me at: klausjoynson(at)gmail.com or follow me on Twitter: @KlausJoynson

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